a tourist in our own city. that's the best way to describe me. i live 5 minutes away from the national zoo all my life, and have been there for a total of 2 times.

dad's on a self-proposed holiday these few days so he's been taking us out every single day. x_x haven't been getting enough rest though, but when else will i get to go out with him like this-- getting all the attention from him for once.


he took us to Petaling Street today, to find Nazim a Lion. you know, the lion dance kind of lion, that's his current hobby, one of his current hobbies. he likes football and cars and is a lego-freak like any other boy, but his fascination for lion dances still puzzles everyone to why.. ..

and he got one in the end, a smaller one of course than the ones you see during CNY. He could flick Ryan's ears (that's what the lion's called now, Ryan the II to be exact) and flap Ryan's mouth open too. Not being able to blink Ryan's eyes is just a minor setback, considering the fact that Daddy took us all the way there just to look for it, and we found one.

Petaling Street reminds me of Masjid India, where I also made my first visit just recently. Creepy sales guys, crammed walkways, tourists everywhere.. the prices weren't cheap either, for a bunch of fake goods la.. there was nothing for me to look out for either. probably handbags.. but i'm satisfied with my Red benetton. it doesnt look much anymore, but it's something i'd cry my heart out if i ever lose it. or find out it's completely un-usable (i dare not say destroyed or turn to shreds..).


But i like the old shop houses on the street, it reminded me of why i wanted to be an architect. A restoring architect to be exact. the built makes me feel cosy, knowing they hold some memory of their own, only not to be able to tell me so. or something like that. :) too bad people (ehem2 govt) doesnt see much value in taking care of these kind of buildings. at least keep it clean, for God's sake.

Oh well, I can't always get what i want anyway. Kan?

Going to the Da Vinci exhibit tomorrow in PSN! need to do a little research on that guy. did you know he was thought to be autistic? i love that fact *imagining Nasri with a long white beard*

had "the Discussion" with my daddy. He's not letting me go to Australia or anywhere AWAY from the country. he's not even keen on letting me go if the campus of whatever institution I finally end up in is in sabah/sarawak.

its okay. its okay..

there were lotsa things he told me about, some were familiar set of sentences, others were reminders and the rest were all unplugging the clog of my shallow thoughts.
he said his main goal for me is to be a good muslim. my academic upbringing is secondary. although at times it could still be his number one, but you can understand that if you know who my daddy is. his upbringing is different from mine, and he hopes to keep it that way.
i can understand that, can't i?
success-- he said God loves everyone equally. wait. he meant that everyone has equal opportunities to be loved by Him. at the end of the day, those with the most taqwa succeeds in gaining His pleasure. and worldly-wise? we are given the same degree of wealth. other people has got lotsa money, but knowing how their lives function, you still wouldn't want to be placed in their shoes, would you? Qana'ah. i've been lacking that, everytime i pray to God for a new house/car/to go to melbourne.

but i'm glad. grateful.. to know my daddy loves me very much. not to let me go just yet. the way he reasoned, i just understand. it's okay.. and my mummy to understand how i feel about it too, and to know she's always praying for me to be okay out there. always having Someone watching. it's very.. safe. to know these things after you compare this with.. other "examples" of kids let loose.

i am okay. a bit uncomfortable with having to scout for a local U, i am very sorry, but i am rationally alright with my daddy's decision. emotionally throwing a tantrum, but i'm still sane at the moment.

than God for Ayah Mad's 6 packs-- of durian. to cheer me up of course.